Growing with gratitude for life's challenges
Dear Dad, We all gathered together last night at D’s and were reminiscing about your death. It’s been ten years, and funny how we all remember it differently. I say ‘all’ but really there was just D and I, her two sons, and my middle daughter and family. Our family has dwindled away to nothing. […]
Read MoreSleeping in was a sin in my father’s eyes. Even as a teenager, no matter how late we’d been out the night before, if we weren’t up with the sun, Dad would treat us to an icy face wash. The early bird catches the worm! Laziness was not tolerated either. If we were ever caught […]
Read MoreMarital breakdown is a catastrophic event for the whole family – one minute you’re driving down the road, all three kids on board, headed for routine activities, and the next you’ve hit a wall of water with nowhere to go but to bail out. You might swerve off the road to avoid going under, and […]
Read More“Pay attention to your inner child,” my therapist advised me when I first got sick. It seems that fear causes emotional regression and any needs suppressed over the years come barreling forward in irrational outbursts. Hard to deny that one from where I’m sitting. I’ve been dreaming about children lately – children in my care – […]
Read More“Can we watch something?” My four-year-old granddaughter climbs onto the bed and snuggles in. It’s been a routine we’ve shared as long as I’ve been ill. The question makes her parents cringe; they are trying hard to raise their child without excessive screen time. Cable TV does not exist in their world, so coming to […]
Read More“You’re the only help I have right now, Mom! I just feel like I’m not a priority for you.” “When you spend all your energy on the kids, I feel as if there is never any left over for me. I just get the dregs.” “It would be really nice if you could spend some […]
Read MoreGo play in traffic, kids! was a favourite direction of one of my aunt’s. This particular aunt was snarly, often critical, and never filtered in her commentary on life. Her favourite point of contention was how spoiled we children were, how unappreciative, etc. She also frequently threatened to move to Alaska to get away from […]
Read MoreThere is a woman following me around, stabbing me in the chest every time I go near my husband, so I go off on my own. The pain is too much to bear. “Why are you alone?” someone asks me. “It’s just easier that way.” “Why don’t you stab her back?” “She only wounds me, […]
Read MoreMy aunt gave up her daughter for a chance at love. Can’t remember which marriage it was – there were seven in all – but he didn’t want children, so she just asked around if someone would take M, then sixteen. A few relatives tried, but my cousin, the depths of whose rejection is unfathomable, strayed […]
Read More“Your homework for this week is to write about the things your mother taught you,” my psychologist advised at the end of our session. Memories have been resurfacing and along with them rage. I am incensed that I was never protected from some of the things that happened to me. “Well, she taught me that […]
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One Woman's Quest II 