Growing with gratitude for life's challenges
Needs, it seems, are an important ingredient in any healthy relationship. I’ve been listening to Esther Perel’s podcast: Where Should We Begin? and in almost every couple’s counselling session she records, needs come up. “I’ve never been any good at identifying my needs,” I tell my therapist in a recent session. “In fact, from an […]
Read MoreFather worked six days a week, and with the exception of Saturday, was gone from 7:30 am to 10:30 pm. Sundays were reserved for family day: usually church, visiting, and a formal dinner. He could be fun at times, but typically he was tyrannical – angry and critical – calling us idiots, useless, and expletives […]
Read MorePermanence is not a quality of harmony. Can’t understand why I should ever hope for such a thing, yet here I am disappointed again, disagreement having chipped away at momentary bliss. Must have been born to please; born not with the usual film of childbirth, but with a bluish red hue of guilt – the […]
Read MoreOriginally posted on One Woman's Quest:
At thirty-one, I had to learn to change my approach to life, because the old way wasn’t working. The old way put me at the center of the family (even though I was fifth born), listening to and attempting to resolve every family issue: Do you think your…
Originally posted on One Woman's Quest:
I was forty before I could finally ask my mother about her constant criticism of me growing up. We were alone together, in the car, driving out of town. I had her undivided attention. “Help me to understand, something,” I prefaced the conversation. “When I was young, you…
“What’s the worst that can happen?” Mom likes to muse. “If you can handle that, you can handle anything.” When a marriage of seventeen years fell apart, Mom said: “There is always Welfare.” I didn’t want to accept the ‘worst’ for my life, and so I fought to stay afloat, and rather than succumb to […]
Read MoreOne of my favourite podcasts is The Moth where people share real life stories based on a theme. An episode I listened to recently focused on coincidence. According to Oxford Dictionary (online edition) the definition of coincidence is: a remarkable concurrence of events or circumstances without apparent causal connection. This particular podcast includes stories replayed […]
Read MoreI am that kid. First day of school, teacher proudly organized, in charge, forgets she is addressing humans not machines programmed to comply. I cannot tolerate oppression: authority already overbearing in my life. I am a pressure cooker, combustible, ready to explode, like an uncorked grenade counting down the seconds. “We need to set some […]
Read More“I’ve started to write short stories again – something I haven’t done since I was a kid.” “How’s that going?” “It’s disturbing, actually; the endings are the same even after all these years.” “Like what?” “Me in a straitjacket, completely mad.” “Oh, I see!” As do I – there are never happy endings, just a […]
Read More“Grandma, when will you be better?” It is 5:00 on a school morning, and I am sitting at my granddaughter’s bedside nursing her through a sore tummy. “Not sure, Honey.” “Oh,” she shrugs. She is four and has never known me any other way. Later, we snuggle up and watch Moana. “You are just like […]
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One Woman's Quest II 