November 16, 2012, I penned: Cancer, it turns out, it is a powerful proponent of simplicity. Faced with uncertainty, one is forced to examine the complexities of life and cull. Our lives are reduced to three priorities: – Making healthy choices – Caring for relationships – Reducing financial burden. Necessity demands that any extraneous commotion […]
Just finished watching Jennifer Brea’s award-winning documentary on ME/CFS entitled, Unrest, and so many thoughts are racing through my mind. This is an important film, not just for the millions missing because of this disease and their loved ones; it should be required viewing for all who work in the field of medicine, and those […]
A recent Facebook post suggested that babysitting contributes to prolonged life for grandparents. Given how exhausted I am after spending time with my granddaughters, I find that hard to believe, and yet… there is an undeniable glow that lingers for days every time I am exposed to those precious little souls. “You spend all of […]
“Was I right about the doctor?” the middle-aged receptionist asked cheerfully as I emerged from the examination room and waited for my next appointment. “He’s very good,” I agreed. I had hesitated to see one more specialist after a history of dead ends trying to get a diagnosis for what was clearly something wrong with […]
The floor reached out for me, pulling me down with alarming force. I fought to remain upright, waves of nausea weakening my resolve. One hand flew to my brow – now a pool of sweat – while the other searched for the phone. I’m calling 9-1-1, I texted my husband. “Stay with us, V.J.!” the […]
Pain. I push against it. Challenge it, like a warrior intent on proving that I am indestructible, unwilling to flinch. If I ignore it, I tell myself, then it will cease to have power over me. Except, bit by bit it gnaws at my edges, tearing me down and just as I’m about to succumb […]
“I can’t process your application with the information I’ve been given,” the woman on the phone is officious, likely hates her job, I theorize. “Your doctor has only sent me four medical reports; there is not enough here to support an inability to work.” I might have guffawed at this. “I can barely manage day-to-day […]
The challenge, when dealing with a chronic illness – in my case ME/CFS – is staying positive. Momentary improvements in health are toppled by extreme crashes. It’s like living in an eddy where, every once a while, the current quiets and it feels as if there might be an escape, and then the weather shifts […]
Prolonged illness almost always equates to isolation. Initially, kindness reveals itself through visits from friends and coworkers, meals dropped off, and many offers to help in any way. Not yet adjusted to my rapidly changing situation, I was overwhelmed and somewhat embarrassed by such an outpouring, having always considered myself strong and independent. Perhaps, I […]