No One Will Ever Love You

June 30, 2016.Reading time 7 minutes.

A secret: I had to teach myself how to receive love. Born fifth of my mother’s six children, I was unexpected – an ill-advised accident, given the difficulties my mother had in previous child births. Conceived during a tumultuous time – after the father of her first children abandoned her, beaten and penniless – I […]

Table Talk – A Dream Guide

June 28, 2016.Reading time 9 minutes.

I dream that Ric has removed our dining table. There has been no discussion, no explanation, just an empty space to mark his actions. Even in my dreams, I am asking questions: Is he having it repaired, or replacing it? Surely, not replacing, I think, as the table was his mother’s. I conclude that all […]

First Hurdle Cleared

May 12, 2016.Reading time 1 minute.

Just returned from the hospital, having left my husband in the Cardiac Surgery Recovery Unit. He was not transferred to the unit until after 9:00 pm, so while I was able to see and touch him, he was not yet conscious. It is hard to pinpoint the gamut of emotions that have coursed through me […]

This Life A Road

This life a road –the way preparedsigns to guide me,and still, I get lost. Construction, distraction,disobedience – throw me off –tendency to choose tougher routes,broken down and been sidelined And yet, the road still beckons,invites progression, thrills.A rolling stone gathers no moss,my father liked to say, and so… I push ahead, keep motoring,trust the obstacles […]

Wings

(Written during my bedbound years with ME/CFS)

Myalgic Encephalomyelitis

May is Myalgic Encephalomyelitis awareness month. Also known as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, this disease is characterized by exhaustion after exertion. The exertion can be physical -taking a shower; emotional – worrying or obsessing; or mental- filling out forms. The best source of information about ME/cfs, as we call it, is the Bateman Horne Center. They […]