Caring Lessons: A Review

January 5, 2021.Reading time 2 minutes.

I ordered Lois Hoitenga Roelofs’ book, Caring Lessons: A Nursing Professor’s Journey of Faith and Self, after having been a fan of her blog for several years. Lois writes with candour about her life challenges, and on the blog in particular, about her journey through her husband’s terminal cancer. It is the candour with which […]

Reggie

October 6, 2020.Reading time 3 minutes.

I have a crush on my brother! I know that’s not right, but he is so gorgeous! Long golden hair, blue, blue eyes, and a smile that makes me melt. I can’t look at him without feeling all funny inside, and I’m sure he can tell. He doesn’t talk much, but once he picks up […]

So Many Questions!

October 2, 2020.Reading time 2 minutes.

It’s difficult, at eleven, to understand the rationale of adults. Why the lies? Who are they protecting? I know now that my “cousin” is actually my brother. This makes sense. Not just a brother, but my oldest sister’s twin! I cannot imagine the pain that separation has caused them. I’m so excited to have brothers! […]

The Mystery Cousin

September 30, 2020.Reading time 3 minutes.

The boy at the door was tall and slim, and although I had no idea who he was, he said: “You must be V.J.!” A whoosh of Mom’s skirt obliterated my response. She was hugging and kissing him and exclaiming: “Oh my! Can’t believe it is you!” Then my sisters were there, crowding our small […]

When the Unravelling Started

September 27, 2020.Reading time 4 minutes.

It was a neighbour girl that started it. We played together one day – a rare occurrence, as she seldom came outside. “How do you know you’re not adopted?” she hissed at me, as if to say: You don’t know everything. I started to answer, but then, the words got stuck. How did I know? […]

Lost and Found

July 23, 2019.Reading time 1 minute.

Fallen limbs and pathless woodsno obstacle for a wild childleft to her own devices,searching for a self. Only with age, and sproutingcurves, did I learn to be afraidof shadows, that the woodsequated with wolves and lurking And that abandoned placeshouse evil – held captive therejust this side of adolescence – lost all that innocence gifts […]

Tell Us A Story, Grandma!

February 28, 2019.Reading time 5 minutes.

“Tell us a story, Grandma! Tell us about when you were a girl?” The question throws me. First, because childhood is so far away, but secondly, because my stories are tainted with pain and hurt. Looking into this pair of eager eyes though, I know they want a story filled with good will and hope. […]

Bedside Conversations

January 8, 2019.Reading time 3 minutes.

“Mom, I want you to know that I don’t harbour any ill will toward our past. If I seek to know what happened, it is only to understand myself so that I might heal.” Mom nods, considers my words. “There is so much I could have done differently.” “No. You did what you could with […]

“Apprenticed to Venus”: a Review

October 4, 2018.Reading time 2 minutes.

Subtitled My Secret Life with Anaïs Nin, Apprenticed to Venus is the part memoir, part novel of Tristine Rainier, who mentored under the famous diarist. Although I have been inspired by Nin’s words, I have known very little about her, so I was eager to read this book. Rainier, on an errand from her artist aunt, encounters […]

Baseline

September 26, 2018.Reading time 2 minutes.

Baseline is the name of the road on which my final high school stands. My ‘last chance’ authorities called it, as I’d been ‘asked to leave’ the previous one. Turned out the attendance officer was a parent of a former classmate and recognized me. I felt trapped. Skipping school was how I coped in those […]

The Car Crash

That time, playing in the muck,foot emerging without a boot,hopping and laughingall the way home… Then, later, on the busthe impact of the carthe windshield crackinglike a giant spiderblood all overthe dead lady’s face All in the past –sunroof openkids riding along,music blaring But trauma is a spiderArachne reaching into happy placesand as much as […]

Empty Surges

Measured in spoonfulsprogress imperceptible Still feel the angst ofno-time-to-breathe lifestyle pressured from withinto get-it-done spend unavailable resourcesruminating solutions push against the wallswith little to show surrender to impotencyand wait for the next surge.

Hurricane

Sister was a hurricane –destruction her path Tried to calm, encouragebut her core was damaged Try to reach her now, across death’s abyss understand beforeher legacy swallows me.