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Needs and Relationship

Needs, it seems, are an important ingredient in any healthy relationship.  I’ve been listening to Esther Perel’s podcast:  Where Should We Begin? and in almost every couple’s counselling session she records, needs come up. “I’ve never been any good at identifying my needs,” I tell my therapist in a recent […]

What Does It Take To Belong?

We roll into our new neighbourhood cautiously guided by an old-timer, who after we finally manage to maneuver into our RV site, introduces himself as Graham. “Been here since the park first opened,”  he beams and then proceeds to point to each of the other trailers and run down who’s […]

Divorce Through the Rear View Mirror

Perspective is everything and seldom appreciated until the offending circumstances are well in the rear view mirror. When my former marriage fell apart, I did the unthinkable and moved out. The one that leaves loses, I’d heard over and over.  I was hell-bent that I would not lose. What I […]

The Nature of the Beast

Tale as old as time, True as it can be, Barely even friends, Then somebody bends, Unexpectedly I awaken every morning with a song playing in my head, like an internal radio that self tunes.  Typically, it is a line or two which follows me throughout my day:  a personal […]

Mom Said Marry Well

I keep dreaming about young men:  confidant, seductive, virile young men.  In my dreams, they cozy up to me, offer promises of love, and always, I remember who I am – a dried up old woman condemned to disability – and wake up…reluctantly. Thing is, men have always been a […]

Illness and Isolation

Prolonged illness almost always equates to isolation. Initially, kindness reveals itself through visits from friends and coworkers, meals dropped off, and many offers to help in any way.  Not yet adjusted to my rapidly changing situation, I was overwhelmed and somewhat embarrassed by such an outpouring, having always considered myself […]

RV-Able: Discovering New Life

“I feel like we’re on the edge of a whole new life,” I tell my husband as we cruise through the Santa Rosa Conservation area, nothing but white sand dunes and water on either side of us.   “I feel it too.  I just want to keep on going.” It’s our […]