If I Knew; I’d Change It

I’m struggling with myself. It isn’t the first time, and I’m certain it won’t be the last. There is no definable reason, and yet my emotional self tries to find blame: it’s Ric’s behaviour; it’s because I’m homesick; it’s my illness. Rationally, I recognize that my life is full of blessings right now, and this […]

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July Blues

Summer bursts with activities and plans, and I am already wondering at the folly of trying to move in the midst of it all.  I put out a group text yesterday to solicit help from our kids, and the response was as expected: We are away that weekend. Can we help with the pre-move prep? […]

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Hawk Inspired

Originally posted on One Woman's Quest II:
(A short story; fiction.) The grey days are the hardest; you know the ones, when the clouds, so full of tears, are working themselves up to a full-blown cry. My projection, I know, but I prefer to think that the weather mirrors my own inner gloom. I…

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Tired of the Same Old Endings

“I’ve started to write short stories again – something I haven’t done since I was a kid.” “How’s that going?” “It’s disturbing, actually; the endings are the same even after all these years.” “Like what?” “Me in a straitjacket, completely mad.” “Oh, I see!” As do I – there are never happy endings, just a […]

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Illness and Isolation

Prolonged illness almost always equates to isolation. Initially, kindness reveals itself through visits from friends and coworkers, meals dropped off, and many offers to help in any way.  Not yet adjusted to my rapidly changing situation, I was overwhelmed and somewhat embarrassed by such an outpouring, having always considered myself strong and independent. Perhaps, I […]

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Depression On Board

Depression rides along with chronic illness, not as a cause, but as a response.  The limitations of this disease (ME/CFS) are not easily defined, yet, if pushed, will result in undeniable consequences.  You would think that after three years, I would know this, and yet, I continually fall into patterns of denial. We travelled 3,000 […]

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