Pause Perspectives

Is procrastination a pause
or fear seeping in?
Let’s take a moment –
broken silence –
a timely pause …
collect our thoughts
leave a seed
and remember
Be like water
like the squirrel
touch the softness
wave goodbye
to the noise
till the end of this ride.

(This poem is an amalgamation of our collective thoughts on this week’s focus: pause. Thank you for the many inspired posts you shared:)

Reena Saxena
I Write Her
Eugi’s Causerie 1
Sharing Thoughts
Nova’s Namastè 365 Online
Heart to Heart
Stuff and what if…
Zebra’s Child
Zebra’s Child

VJ’s Weekly Challenge #100: Pause

The world is a noisy place at the moment, and rightfully so. The bubble of denial has burst when it comes to systemic racism. As people march in protest demanding change, a virus lurks, threatening further losses. And, I haven’t even mentioned the absurdity of political ranting that seems so inappropriately off base right now.

It is tempting to throw oneself into the fray – emotions running high, intellect chomping for a word – and yet, I fear a loss of grounding. We need calm minds, and clear agendas to guide us in such times.

Passions are ignited. Words and actions have a place. Change is afoot. Let us remember to pause – to quiet the noise – long enough to ensure we are actually making a difference.

May your pauses bring you inspiration this week. I look forward to your responses.

Time For Pause

The current struggle: keeping up with holiday festivities, fighting a stubborn cold, and caring for grandchildren, has taken its toll. I am behind in reading posts, and feeling overwhelmed by social media.

Time for a pause.

I will be scaling back activities till the season has passed and I’ve regained a semblance of normalcy.

Not sure yet how the New Year will unfold.

Best to all for a good holiday season. May health and happiness be yours.

Thank you to all the inspired participants this week:

Reena Saxena
Stuff and what if…
one letter UP

Pausing to Revel

Remnants of wrapping paper peek out from under the sofa. Leftover goodies tempt from the countertop. In the aftermath of our family gathering, I pause to enjoy the peace, processing the sweetness of the day.

So many precious moments:

“Grandma, can we have another present?” Three-year-old August, so enthralled with the magic of the day.

“Mom, this soup is the best yet!” So heartwarming to be able to cook for loved ones and witness their enjoyment.

“Who wants to help Grandma?” Three eager faces gathering around.

My heart is full and I am exhausted.

This is the advantage of this stage of life: the ability to imbibe in the pause.

(Thursdays I write about the things that fill me with gratitude. My challenge this week is “pause“. Image from personal collection.)

V.J.’s Weekly Challenge #77: pause

As the world bustles, and we rush to meet deadlines, check off to-do lists, and fulfill those party invites, find a moment to pause, look, and listen.

Share a photograph, thought, or inspiration.

To participate, just create a post and then link back to this one, or drop a comment or link in the comment section.

Look forward to your responses.

(Image from

Distraught? Pause

Yesterday, I was ready to give up – on everything.  I was convinced that my husband’s distraction meant he didn’t love me and that our marriage was coming to an end.  I  panicked to think that we are planning to leave home and I will be cut off from family.  I convinced myself that I am doomed to a loveless, sterile existence, and wondered what was the point of it all.

Typically verbose and sunny, I barely uttered two words – my mind was clouded with too many dark thoughts.

What triggered it?

th-1Hard to tell for sure, but yesterday’s blog post, courtesy of Dr. Nicholas Jenner served as an anchor that stopped me from blurting out things I would surely have regretted later.  His timely words reminded me of how deeply my relationship with my father still affects me.  Everything I was feeling could be linked back to childhood.

Thank goodness I had the common sense to wait for my inner churning to settle before speaking.

Initiating a confrontation when emotions and anxieties are at a climax is never a good idea.

Today, exhausted, and calmer, I am able to recognize that the problems that made me want to jump ship yesterday, are likely easily resolved with open and honest dialogue.

I recognize now that I had projected my father’s emotional absence into my husband’s distraction.  While it’s true that we pick partners with whom we can replay the wounded areas of our original child/parent relationship, it is important to separate out the realities.  My father was emotionally unavailable because he was a) a workaholic, and b) an alcoholic, and c) unable to live authentically (he identified as female although his outer body was male).  Is my husband emotionally unavailable?  At times, yes.  But neither to the extent, nor for the same reasons as my dad.  I can talk to him about it, without the backlash that might have resulted with Dad.

As a child, my need for love and reassurance was constantly squashed.  “You have no problems; you don’t need anything” were the messages I received; so much so that I would rock my sobbing self to sleep with the mantra:  “I don’t need anyone; I don’t need anything.”

As an adult, I recognize the fallacy in this type of thinking, and have worked hard at articulating and addressing my personal needs.  Relationships, I have come to understand, are about meeting each others needs.   This morning, I am able to recognize that this subject is up for discussion without the panic and childlike terror of yesterday.

th.jpgYesterday, I was read to give up – for whatever reason.  It was an emotional crisis triggered by unknown fear.

Thank goodness I had the wherewithal to wait before reacting.