Blessing Of Interracial Union

“What’s her name?” “I can’t tell you.” “What?  Why not?  Do I know her?” “No, Mom.  If I tell you her name, you’ll ask too many questions that I’m not ready to answer yet.” “Oh.” “A son is sweetness and strength and mystery;” Call it Mother’s intuition, but I could tell there was someone special […]

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Distraught? Pause

Yesterday, I was ready to give up – on everything.  I was convinced that my husband’s distraction meant he didn’t love me and that our marriage was coming to an end.  I  panicked to think that we are planning to leave home and I will be cut off from family.  I convinced myself that I […]

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Codependency: The Role Of A Father

    FREE FROM CODEPENDENCY As I work longer with clients, it is clear that the parenting style that they were subjected to as a child is extremely important in determining how they see the world. This conditioning is often taken into adulthood and causes dysfunction in relationships and in life generally. This includes anyone who feels […]

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Needs and Relationship

Needs, it seems, are an important ingredient in any healthy relationship.  I’ve been listening to Esther Perel’s podcast:  Where Should We Begin? and in almost every couple’s counselling session she records, needs come up. “I’ve never been any good at identifying my needs,” I tell my therapist in a recent session.  “In fact, from an […]

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Love “Swimming Lessons”!

What an incredible story!  Claire Fuller creates characters who are flawed and yet sympathetic.  Meet Gil, an aging writer and incorrigible Lothario, who sudden obsession with books leads his daughters to be concerned about his state of mind.  Meet Ingrid, his wife who has been missing for eleven years, presumed dead, and whose voice haunts […]

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Another Chapter Closes

The house creaks and cracks with such ferociousness, I am unable to sleep.  Perhaps it does not like the starkness of bare walls, the absence of furniture, the finality of boxes stacked and sealed.  It is my last night here – just myself, a king sized bed and a complaining house. So much has changed […]

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The Vortex

(Note:  Much of my inspiration for writing comes from dreams, which I typically interpret in the form of poetry, but recently I have been challenging myself to write prose.  A Bee’s Perspective is the poetic response to the dream behind this piece.) Even as the floorboards beneath her heave and crack with a thunderous roar, […]

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Divorce Through the Rear View Mirror

Perspective is everything and seldom appreciated until the offending circumstances are well in the rear view mirror. When my former marriage fell apart, I did the unthinkable and moved out. The one that leaves loses, I’d heard over and over.  I was hell-bent that I would not lose. What I failed to do was consider […]

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How To Sabotage Happiness

“I get hit on everyday at work,” a young mother recently disclosed.  “Anyone of those men would be happy to look after me. My husband just doesn’t appreciate me enough!” I don’t know what has motivated this woman to make such a comment, but I fear she is on the brink of destroying many lives. “There […]

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Building a Marriage

Sometimes ‘aha’ moments come out of the most unexpected events. I think it started with a compliment from my son.  He and his new wife had invited the family for dinner last night, and as my husband was tied up all day, Jay offered to pick me up early. “You look nice, Mom!” were the […]

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