Growing with gratitude for life's challenges
“Your homework for this week is to write about the things your mother taught you,” my psychologist advised at the end of our session. Memories have been resurfacing and along with them rage. I am incensed that I was never protected from some of the things that happened to me. “Well, she taught me that […]
Read More“Are you guys brother and sister?” the question came from our soon-to-be five-year-old granddaughter. Dropped off by her mother for an overnight stay, we had a day of cousins and uncles and aunts, and of course, Grandma and Grandpa. I brushed off her comment with a: “No, we’re married”, but the innocent observation shook me. […]
Read MoreWrote a prescription for the perfect man: made him tall, strong, romantic, dependable, family oriented; told myself I was ready. Projected expectations onto the first likely candidate – single dad, three full-time kids – read desire in his brooding eyes, ignored the burden of his grief, the irrational speed at which we moved, the complications […]
Read MoreA secret: I had to teach myself how to receive love. Born fifth of my mother’s six children, I was unexpected – an ill-advised accident, given the difficulties my mother had in previous child births. Conceived during a tumultuous time – after the father of her first children abandoned her, beaten and penniless – I […]
Read MoreI dream that Ric has removed our dining table. There has been no discussion, no explanation, just an empty space to mark his actions. Even in my dreams, I am asking questions: Is he having it repaired, or replacing it? Surely, not replacing, I think, as the table was his mother’s. I conclude that all […]
Read MoreHad my second ozone/UVH/Glutathione treatment yesterday. This time there was no surge of physical energy, in fact, I felt quite tired afterwards, although my heart tended to race most of the day, interrupting any attempts at rest. Of course, it could be the onrush of rage I feel at the fall out with my daughters, […]
Read MoreThis post is hard to write, however; I have no where else to vent, and need desperately to process what has happened. Yesterday was Mother’s Day, and inadvertently my two daughters and I had booked a mani-pedi for that date, the original intention being one last pampering for my middle daughter before she goes into […]
Read More“I’ve had this recurring dream in which we are on vacation and he leaves me – just walks away,” I tell my therapist. “I wake up in a panic, feeling abandoned.” “Oh dear,” she says. “I wonder if these dreams would change if he started looking after himself?” “Yes!” I exclaim, relieved. These are not […]
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One Woman's Quest II 