Without resources to deal with the trauma of my youth, I buried it. It would surface again, when as a young mother, I sought for a deeper understanding of life. I searched for the light and found only darkness – the truth of my own victimhood.
I did not see how my obsession with healing – the focus on my own wounded soul – overshadowed the needs of my own loved ones. The victim becomes the abuser: an unforeseen twist.
Only now through age and openness do I see the folly of my intentions leering back at me.
One Woman's Quest II 
((hugs)) I totally get it. Forgive yourself.
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Thank you!
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You’re welcome!
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You alluded to a serious reason why I never wanted children. Regret over questionable parenting decisions might only come back to haunt me so why bother to have kids?
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Mistakes are a given, I’d say. The joy outweighs it.
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Not for me when I taught for 30 years and saw enough children to fill several lifetimes.
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😂
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Oh yes, I truly get this. It is painful to process this realization.
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It is. Thanks Susan
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I think all of us (or at least most of us) are works in progress, V.J., and nobody is perfect. I also have many regrets and wish I could travel back in time to correct some of my missteps, but I fear that’s part of being a human being.
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I know you are right, Tanja. Some days, though, it ‘s hard to shake it.
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I can relate to that.
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If only we could be on the outside looking in. Hugs!
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Amen to that…except then we’d be perfect. 🤮
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Omigosh! Being perfect would be boring! 🤪
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“light-blinded” – wow, what an incredible way to describe it. The trick is to figure it out and it seems you’ve done that. Brave and beautiful!
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Thanks Wynne.
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A deep, dark night of the soul to realize this.
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You got that right!
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We must attend to ourselves in order to attend to others. But as Sadje remarked–how to reconcile being pulled in so many directions at the same time? (K)
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Right? Life! 😳
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Unforeseen twists…yes. Impossible to anticipate, I think. Much love to you, VJ. 💕
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Thanks Victoria for that vote of confidence. I do tend to be hard on myself.
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I hear you. Take care, VJ. ❤️
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It’s a hard line to tread. Look after yourself but others too- it can be overwhelming at times.
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Indeed. Thanks Sadje
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You’re most welcome 🙏🏼
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It’s often hard to see the forest for the trees. If only we could all live in hindsight…
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Sigh… wouldn’t want to go back though.
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Me either!
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