Three years ago today, I dragged myself out of bed, and with the aid of my walker (and likely a wheelchair), I paid a visit to a local doctor/ practitioner of Functional Medicine. Getting out in those days was a huge ordeal, and typically entailed a backlash that would last weeks. I was that sick. […]
The new year grabbed me in a choke hold and hog-tied me before I had a chance to even think about what it might bring. It started with a text that my mother was in hospital, followed by a harried searching of flights and anxious speculating about how I’ll get home. Me, who hasn’t ventured […]
Originally posted on One Woman's Quest II: (A short story; fiction.) The grey days are the hardest; you know the ones, when the clouds, so full of tears, are working themselves up to a full-blown cry. My projection, I know, but I prefer to think that the weather mirrors my own inner gloom. I…
Two years ago, I was barely able to get out of bed. Two years ago, I wondered if life would ever get better, or if I was doomed to a future of isolation and deprivation. Words were the weapon I employed to battle my way out of the kind of depression that accompanies debilitating illness. […]
It’s no mystery that stripped of all obligations and confined to a bed provides the coveted time to pursue writing skills, however; it is the actual experience of illness (in my case ME/CFS) that provides the platform for expansion. Although I have been a ‘writer’ since my early years, the past four have marked a […]
Originally posted on One Woman's Quest: Meditating on the majestic beauty of the trees outside my window, I come to recognize something about myself. I cannot help but think that even though they are symbols of quiet strength, trees are not without their own vulnerabilities. Acts of Nature, or even human folly can bring…
“Was I right about the doctor?” the middle-aged receptionist asked cheerfully as I emerged from the examination room and waited for my next appointment. “He’s very good,” I agreed. I had hesitated to see one more specialist after a history of dead ends trying to get a diagnosis for what was clearly something wrong with […]
“Grandma, when will you be better?” It is 5:00 on a school morning, and I am sitting at my granddaughter’s bedside nursing her through a sore tummy. “Not sure, Honey.” “Oh,” she shrugs. She is four and has never known me any other way. Later, we snuggle up and watch Moana. “You are just like […]
Explosive, sometimes irrational, anger is a steady companion of addiction. Anyone who has lived with or been an addict will recognize the pattern played out in the pages of Mishka Shubaly’s memoir : I Swear I’ll Make It Up To You. Shubaly holds nothing back in the telling of his story, subtitled: A Life On […]
The challenge, when dealing with a chronic illness – in my case ME/CFS – is staying positive. Momentary improvements in health are toppled by extreme crashes. It’s like living in an eddy where, every once a while, the current quiets and it feels as if there might be an escape, and then the weather shifts […]