Explosive, sometimes irrational, anger is a steady companion of addiction. Anyone who has lived with or been an addict will recognize the pattern played out in the pages of Mishka Shubaly’s memoir : I Swear I’ll Make It Up To You.
Shubaly holds nothing back in the telling of his story, subtitled: A Life On The Low Road. The rage that spews forth is acidic, and at times, difficult to stomach, however; this is a missive about more than inconsolable pain: it is a message of hope.
As I often do, I listened to the audio version, in this case read by the author. His voice is rough, and gravelly – a testament to years of self-abuse – and the narration raw. There were moments when I questioned my allegiance to Shubaly’s tale, and yet, I persisted, a choice I did not regret in the end.
Shubaly’s personal account reflects many universal truths: the damage created in divorce; the dark side of drugs and alcohol; and the power of the human spirit to overcome adversity, no matter how daunting.
The relationship (or lack of relationship) Shubaly has with his father resonates deeply with me, especially when he realizes that his perception of events leading to their estrangement was built on misunderstanding.
I Swear I’ll Make It Up To You is a reminder of the complexity of human relations, and a promise that life’s journey is seldom predictable, and always worth the effort.