When I had a mothermy hair would cascadein curls of auburn perfectiona red velvet bow to accentuate the wave And I’d wear my bestnewly sewn frockwith lace at the neckand fishnet stockingsand patent Mary Janes And the girls giggling with delightwould skip hand-in-handto the school promand the boys shyly perchedagainst the back wall would wonderhow […]
Isolated and incapacitatedI am prohibited from partakingof the influx of information incessantly presented consequently cut offfrom prescribed expectationsdictating costuming and culture external expressions of acceptanceare sorely missing, suggestingan overall lack of self-worth. Interestingly inverse to such conclusionsis the sudden contentment that arisesfrom escaping the mayhem Internal relief overrides dictated performancesurrendering willingly to intrinsic motivationand renewed […]
One Woman's Quest II 
The myth I carried upon my shoulders for the longest time was that I was not worthy. It took perimenopause before I really understood what I had given up for all those years.
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Oh, I can relate,Susi.
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((hugs))
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Love the question…and my answer’s the same as Wynne’s! Yep – having “special” stuff that never gets used…household items, fancy dishes, clothes (usually uncomfortable anyhow). 😉
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Vicki, your comment about the uncomfortable clothes made me laugh. Our mother sewed our clothes, and those Easter dresses with the lace collars were the worst, lol.
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So glad I gave you a giggle! Xo, VJ! 🥰
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You sure did 😁
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Always keep a smile on your face, but after a while it seems insincere, especially if you are hurting inside. Sometimes, I think parents didn’t know any better or just wanted to show they had the upper hand.
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I think you are right, Eugi. It’s what they believed their role to be
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😊
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There must be some baggage hidden in there, but I was so determined to not be like my parents (or more that I just wanted to go my own way) that I struggle to come with any examples!
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I think that is the natural pendulum of evolution, Eilene. I remember not wanting to be like mine either, although in some areas I have failed, lol.
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Never burden anyone with your troubles. I’ll never get rid of that one. I did get over the no-corduroy after Memorial Day. (K)
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No corduroy after Memorial day! Heard about white, but not that. We heard the burden one too, and I still struggle with that.
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Don’t go outside with wet hair in the winter; you’ll catch cold. Don’t sit around in a wet bathing suit; you’ll get diarrhea.
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I hadn’t heard about the wet suit, but definitely the wet hair. I was on the swim team, which meant being out in the winter months at 7 am with wet hair every practice day. Lol. My mom was sure I’d die.
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😊
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Oh boy – this is a deep well! One that I’ve been trying to rewrite is that you have to save the best stuff (clothes, dishes, food) for a special occasion.
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Oh yes. The irony is that no one wanted the ‘good’ stuff after Mom was gone.
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Interesting! I don’t remember being told what I should or shouldn’t do as a child. Common sense was always encouraged.
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You were lucky, Sadje.
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Thank you dear friend, I do realize this.
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Put a brave face on no matter…you have to be on your last legs to take a sick day…
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Oh yes. I did it to my own kids – go to school and see how you make out.
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I listened to a keynote speaker, Anthony McLean, yesterday on the topic of mental health and the he talked about the different generations, the pendulum swung from resilience to self-compassion. We’d be of the resilience generation, and because of it we don’t have the same self-compassion. Whereas the self-compassion generation doesn’t know how to deal with the adversity. It’s finding that balance between the two.
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Exactly. I saw the damage caused by both, as you must have too, as educators.
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