I turned to God when my foundation was shaking,
only to find that God was shaking my foundation.
– unknown
I’ve carried this quotation with me since my early thirties, a time when the bottom fell out of my life and I fell into a deep abyss of depression and mental breakdown (or breakthrough, as I now prefer to think of it.)
My mind snapped one day, while I was alone with my three children, trying to get them to their Saturday morning activities. We were in the middle of an intersection turning left when suddenly I had no idea where I was. With cars honking all around, and the children screaming in the backseat, all I could do was cry. Fortunately, a police officer, sensing a problem stopped, and then escorted me back home.
Life, as I had been living it, no longer worked for me. My foundation did not just shake, it split open and I descended into a black hole. I then faced the daunting task of climbing out of that deep chasm and learning to be in the world anew. And I did. One step at a time.
Recognizing that I did have faith – even though it had been years since I’d set foot in a church – was a revelation. I didn’t just have faith in a higher being, but I had faith in myself.
I would have to learn the basics again – how to make Kraft dinner, how to cross the street with a walk sign, how to shop for groceries – and in time, I came to be stronger than I’d been before the fall.
This time, I was building a foundation that I could rely on. A foundation upon I which I would construct a new self.
The focus on foundation has brought a multitude of diverse responses this week – from architectural structures, to crusades, and societal and political foundations, to creativity, and dreams, inner darkness, and even makeup. Thank you all for your thoughtful responses.
I hope you will take a moment to visit the posts of all who contributed:
(If I missed anyone, please let me know.)
See you tomorrow for another challenge!
Very touching story of losing everything one takes for granted and becoming a warrior to find oneself. The courage of your spirit shines bright, V.J.
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Thanks, Olga. Three children motivated me to be strong
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Powerful post.
Your account takes me back to a day I couldn’t find my way home, though I knew I was in the neighborhood. Suddenly the street signs didn’t make sense, like someone had sneaked in and swapped them one for another. In my case, it was after-effects of anesthesia, and eventually wore off. Or did it? I am changed – taking less for granted, paying closer attention to street signs (literal and metaphorical).
My experience pales next to yours. You are to be commended for letting go, and for bringing yourself back up. Also for sharing this – thank you. Your quote above is a keeper. Your experience a solid example of “mysterious ways”.
Hugs …
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Thanks Jazz. We are changed by these things and always for the better, I believe
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