Things Are Looking Up

Had my third Ozonotherapy last week, and apart from feeling flushed and slightly dizzy afterwards (I then realized I was likely dehydrated) I have felt increasingly stronger.  th

“Or is it that you have a new granddaughter?” my husband likes to play Devil’s Advocate.

Having a new grandchild is definitely an energy boost – the motivation to hold that newborn baby has pushed me into to go mode, for sure.  And when my daughter indicated she was feeling overwhelmed and needed me, I came as close to jumping into IMG_1650supermom action as I have in a long time – calming the baby while she slept, cleaning the kitchen, and whipping up a tuna casserole – all tasks I have not been able to do, without severe repercussions.  (Okay, admittedly, as I write this – one day later – I am still in bed at noon, with severe neck and shoulder pain and legs that won’t cooperate.)  But I did it!

One of the hardest things about having a chronic illness, such as ME/CFS, is the mindset that it will one day just disappear – like a bad case of the flu – and I’ll be able to pick up where I left off.  Such fantastical thinking is only a detriment to progress.

If I look back, a year or two years ago, I can see that I am undoubtedly stronger, can do things I wouldn’t even entertain back then.  There has been movement, although it is a slow incline. th

In the past four weeks, since my husband’s heart attack and subsequent surgery, I have had more social interaction – thanks to caring hearts who volunteered to help out – than I’ve had in years.  Two years ago, I had to limit phone conversations to fifteen minutes or less, and even a year ago, I would only see one friend a week for a limited time.  Now I am sharing meals with friends, and able to stay the course of the visit (for the most part).
My husband likes to say that I was having wild parties while he was away.

My doctor would say that socializing is good medicine for the soul.

“You are like  midwives,” I told the two friends who have been here the most.  “overseeing my social rebirth.”

Hard to pinpoint the source of improvement, and does it really matter?  Life is th-1more often than not, one Great Mystery.  With willingness to try and an openness to possibilities, I push forward.  Suffice to say that things are looking up.

 

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Permission to write, paint, and imagine are the gifts I gave myself when chronic illness hit - a fair exchange: being for doing. Relevance is an attitude. Humour essential.

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